did i mention i hate liars?!

monday night i lost my patience with EVERYBODY!  after watching a movie with my 2 roommates, i went to my room to sleep since i had morning appointments the next day. 

suddenly i could hear one of the neighbors, do-do, talking loudly in the living room. when his roommate came over & they started fussing at each other, louder over the volume of the TV, that's when i screamed from my room 'SHUT UP!' to all of them.  eventually they got quieter and went outside for a bit; then came back inside to watch their movie.  no one is allowed to visit or stay in the house except me & my 2 roommates; its in the contract agreement that we ALL signed. 

it took me forever to calm down & go to sleep that night.  plus, i stewed about it all day yesterday.  when i got home from my errands i had planned on talking to J about the guys coming over monday night.  at first J pretended to not know what i was talking about...that's when i blew up at her.  as i'm screaming at her recounting the incident to her, J still insisted that she didn't know that i had been the one who yelled 'shut up!' to them, claiming she thought it was do-do who had yelled it. i told J that she should have never let them in the house to begin with; that's when J tried to blame T for letting them inside.  i informed J that i already talked to T and shot down her lie right then; reminding her that she is a grown woman and that all she had to do was escort them out of the house.

J tried to act pitiful and manipulative by asking why i was yelling at her like a stepchild.  i replied that i'm pissed off and i have every right to be angry at her for what happened monday night. finally i told her that i'm done talking about it and that if it happened again i would call the case manager and report it.  J kept trying to be manipulative with her remarks about my yelling at her; i kept repeating that i was done talking about it and finally stopped replying to her. 

before she walked out of the house i did apologize for screaming but that's at it. 

J didn't come back until after 10:30 last night, and do-do was right behind her walking into the house.  i started yelling at him to 'get out of the house now!'. both J & do-do claimed that C (the case manager) had given him special permission to come get his movies.  i told both of them that i'm calling C since i didn't believe she would say that without notifying me & T about it.  C didn't answer her cell or the texts i sent her. 

Eventually he left.

First thing this morning C returned my call and said she did NOT give him permission to come over at all.  they will deal with him later today for breaking the rule. 

When J got up she came and asked me 'why did i hate her so much?' 

we had a long talk this morning & i clarified that i did NOT hate her but i hated being lied to.  i also despise do-do coming into the house...he's loud & obnoxious and i don't trust him! 

i still don't believe half of what J says to me regardless of how truthful she claims to be.  part of me thinks she's a con-artist playing the pitiful old lady bit.  especially when she makes 900 excuses for her actions.  until i see proof my suspicions will remain. 

chaos, relapses & revelation of character

the beginning of the week, sunday, was cool; me & the 2 roomies went to Bible Study that evening, had a good time and everything was pretty laid back. 

monday, however, was a whole other story:  the 2 roomies are hanging out with each other, running errands etc., i go to my Orthopedics appointment (my carpal tunnel surgery is scheduled for Oct.). by late afternoon J comes back to the house & asks me to cut a pair of old jeans up for cut-off shorts, to wear to the river bank with T. 

around 8 pm there's a knock at the door, i can hear the key going into the lock just as i'm unlocking the door.  when i open it, the neighbor (do-do) is there holding up J to steady her at the doorway; he tells me she's taken too much of her meds and she needs help to her bed.  i take her hand and start leading her to the couch, i'm also on the phone with my mom; just as i turned around J lets go of my hand and falls on the coffee table.  i hang up with mom and get J picked up and set her down on the couch.  what little talking J is doing is just slurred mutterings; trying to figure out if i'm dealing with an overdose of some kind.  i get J to her bed, eventually, mostly carrying-walking her down the hallway because by now she can barely stand up  before falling straight down immediately. J even fell off the bed twice before i could get her seated on the bed.  as i was leaving her room i thought about leaving her door unlocked just for tonight but i locked it anyway at her request. 

i got back on the phone with mom and gave her the highlights on my roomie J.  by then mom suggested calling 911 to see if she needed to go to the ER since she was overdosing on something. 

i called 911 and told them she was overdosing and in a locked bedroom do i needed both Fire & EMTs to get to her.  the EMTs showed up first and we kept talking to J through the door until we got inside to get to her.  we get J loaded up on the gurney and they head out to the ER.  once they left i asked do-do if T left her in the driveway or did J walk home from the river since her shoes were missing too.  He said T dropped her off in the driveway and she was already falling down out of the car.  J had staggered and fell on his porch next door, so he walked her over to our house; she fell at least once more during that walk to the door. 

i kept leaving text messages & voicemails for T and our case manager C about the whole incident. 

the next morning i get a call from D asking about J and if she made it home from the ER; she called there and she had been released already.  this concerned me since she left the house with no shoes.  J was still sleeping it off in her room, apparently she walked home or found a ride.  J had mixed alcohol with her meds, most of which you can't do anyway. 

i was just thankful J had survived the whole ordeal. 

i spent the rest of tuesday trying to come down from the stress of monday night; mostly avoiding J so i wouldn't snap at her. 

J has apologized profusely to me about that night and C apologized to me for having to deal with the crisis as well as thanked me for everything. 

i told J what both T did and what do-do did for her that night; 'do-do may be a jerk but he at least helped you to the door which T did NOT.' 

on the plus side: i have a job interview tomorrow afternoon (prayers for a gig) 

adjusting (1st week)

living with a 58 yr old woman with COPD, partially deaf, chain smoker, who's only been in Tahlequah for 6 weeks is quite the challenge.  i need a lot of prayer for her over-bearing personality.  she's out of some of her meds and had given some small loans to a former roommate, who has a gambling problem; so she's going to have to 'hang in there' until her next pay period to get her meds.  unless by some miracle one of her kids or this former roommate or the do-do neighbor pays her back the money they all owe her this weekend, so she can get her meds and chill out! 

the straw that broke the camel's back tonight was the extra noise she made by bringing her breathing treatment machine into the living room while we were watching t.v. 

so when she finished her treatment and went outside i turned on the closed captioning to finish out the show.  J is loud in her regular speaking voice, and insists on talking while the show is on, rather than wait until commercials.  this is also how she misses half of the show and will ask me during the next show what happened in the previous program. 

i get that she's been by herself at this house for almost a month, and she is quite the chatterbox but PLEASE be considerate of others. 

i've listened to her drone on and on and on about her oldest son & his problems, the do-do neighbor that nobody likes, her last roommate, basically everything that has happened around here the last 6 weeks...no i'm not her counselor but i need to carve out some quiet time so that i don't get sucked into her drama and get side-tracked myself. 

next week i have appointments every other day, so i will be out of the house away from her for a couple days next week.  trying to stretch out those days as much as possible with my limited travelling monies. 

i may spend half of the weekend in my room reading just to keep my sanity.

new digs this weekend

had a look at the new place this morning and i'm already loving it.  its a small house on a 'country road' neighborhood, still in Tahlequah.  its a 9 month stay at this place, which gives me time to apply for disability, continue looking for work and getting to know the town a bit more. the hospital is a straight shot up the road as well. 

there is another person in the house, her name is Jeanie; will meet her this weekend. 

the rules are a lot more relaxed compared to this shelter as well.  plus i can have an overnight pass if needed.  mom's already talking about going up to KC soon for a visit. 

case management meeting

met with my case manager yesterday at CREOKS and i have an interesting option to stay in town at another temporary housing place.  will have a look at it on tuesday morning and then make a more informed decision.